Wednesday, October 19, 2011

September Blur ...October ...

On Tuesday, September 13, 2011, my father was admitted into the hospital for acute renal failure.  He had been ill since September 8th, but declined to get medical attention for several reasons; But I believe the number one reason was that he believed he was stronger & that he could beat it.  .

We know that he felt well on September 7th and was sick with what he thought was a flu or food poisoning at about 1:30pm on September 8th.  September 8th was my sister Celest's birthday.  September 7th was my birthday.  He emailed two birthday cards out one a minute before midnight, the other a minute past midnight.  To this, we thought Dad was sharp as a tac; It was a false sense of security. 

On Thursday, he texted our Priest that he was unfortunately going to miss Wednesday services as he was still feeling ill.  He mistakenly also sent the text to his daughters.  That was the beginning of all worlds colliding.  I called dad to ask him how was he doing.  He, being the strong guy, said he was quite all right & he would be just fine.  On Friday, I called him & he said the same thing ...  "I'm  fine. Don't worry. I'll tough it out."      On Saturday, I called him pushing for medical attention.  Then I began texting him.   I reminded him that 4 days was too long to wait even for someone my age. One text  he sent ... "It's the weekend and ll there is 911...or the emergency room.  I want to see my own doctor on Monday" ...  I brought him chicken noodle soup and checked his vitals. They were perplexing.  His throat was terribly sore.  He was trying to push fluids, but was having trouble.  He still declined medical.  I became frustrated.   He walked me out to my car.  His eyes looked wrong.  They looked glassy and he seemed disconnected.  I couldn't stand it ... he wanted me to go home.  I called and called ... He would not see the doctor until Monday.  He had so many things to take care of.  On Monday he said he had forgotten the time and before he knew it, it was too late.  All that night I called him.  He was getting angry.  I was ready to call the paramedics.

Those who know my father, know that he is unerringly stubborn to the nth degree.  He will do things his way or not at all.  PERIOD.  He is the Dad, and he will always be the DAD.  When we were children, we were to respect him, because he knew best ... because, well ... because he was DAD.

So when it was time to call it, I hesitated out of respect & love.  I paced the floors trying to figure out a way to resolve it without having to drag him out and him be pissed off at me for eternity.   I decided to call the paramedics with no sirens and meet them outside his home.  I would call him to abide by respect to tell him I was coming over, so he would not be caught indiscreet.  A mistake .... on my part I should have just done it and tossed care out the window.   He was upset.

He was awake all that night, he said he was arguing on the phone.  We argued in the morning.  He wanted me to call my aunt.  I told him I would if he went to the ER or the doctor.  We argued some more.   He texted me .... "I'm at the doctors NOW"... It was 11:00 AM Tuesday, October 13th, 2011.   Shortly thereafter, he was in the ER and diagnosed with acute renal failure. 

When all this began, my little Sister Susan was in Montana on vacation visiting my sister littlest sister,  Celest at the time.   I can't even remember when she returned.   But she was there, in the ER and we have been there by his side since.

Today is Wednesday, October 19, 2011.   My Dad is still fighting for his life.